The UD Alumni Relations Blog has always been told that we’re doomed to repeat history’s mistakes and while we tend to believe that, we’re not exactly concerned with the lessons that history teaches. We’re really concerned with the lessons that movies teach us (life is like a box of chocolates – idiots never know what they’re going to get while those with brains look at the included directions to make good choices, thx Forrest!).
If there’s one lesson the UD Alumni Relations Blog has gleaned from the hours mesmerized in front of the teevee, it’s that the machines, aided by artificial intelligence, will eventually rise up to destroy humanity. While we’re fairly certain that we can stop these machines (as the humans always win in the end), we think that it would be ideal if it never got to armageddon war pitting man vs. killer furby; therefore, we are ever vigilant, making sure that the seeds of human destruction are not planted with the creation of a super-duper computer that can do 2.4 trillion calculations per second or something like that.
This is why the UD Alumni Relations Blog is shocked, appalled and terrified that the University of Delaware is actively aiding our machine enemies. How you ask? By acquiring a massive supercomputer cluster to compute intermolecular forces. Once the computer fully understands the bodies of us fragile humans, the bloodletting will begin. This new computer cluster, named ‘kolos’ (how cute), is capable of 2.4 trillion calculations per second (!!!!!!) and through a grant from the Department of Defense University Research Instrumentation Program (codename = Skynet).
A UD research group led by Krzysztof Szalewicz, professor of physics and astronomy, acquired the computer in order to predict the properties of liquids, solids, and biological materials and to hopefully to gain valuable info on our future enemy. Our sister site UDaily interviewed Professor Szalewicz and thankfully brought along some dogs to ensure his humanity.
New ‘kolos’ supercomputer can do 2.4 trillion calculations per second [udel.edu/udaily]
Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: | academics, armageddon, astronomy, matrix, physics, skynet, supercomputer, terminator
[...] UD Alumni Relations The UD Alumni Relations Blog has previously warned you, loyal reader, of our impending doom at the hands of the machines. And while we have been diligently preparing for the beginning of a seemingly never-ending struggle [...]